The Comedy Basement
Winston Kills Nelson
(Nelson accidentally bumps into Winston outside a shopping mall.)
NELSON: Oops, sorry about that.
WINSTON: Hey you… yeah, that's right.. You! You mother fucker, you stole all my nuggets and then you took a poop on my lawn. A bastard is what you are. I… I should call the police on you, SWAT team or something, come down here and bust a whole round of caps in your asshole. What you got to say about that?
NELSON: I really don't know what you're talking about… what… what happened to your pants?
WINSTON: My pants?
NELSON: Yeah, you don't seem to be wearing any. I have some extra shorts if you…
WINSTON: I do not need any shorts. I'm fine right here in my underwear. It's got cartoon dinosaurs on it, you see?
NELSON: Yeah, I can see. What is that, a triceratops?
WINSTON: I have no idea. Never stayed in school long enough to learn about dinosaurs.
NELSON: Don't they teach you that in like, grade two?
WINSTON: How would I know?! I dropped out in grade one.
WINSTON: Fuck you.
NELSON: What did I do?
WINSTON: You're alive.
(Winston kills Nelson.)
Copyright © The Comedy Basement 2009