The Comedy Basement 




Epilogue?
Is it time for The Comedy Basement's epilogue? Has the entire story been told and shared with the world? The answer...?

Not quite.

Despite my efforts to NOT post a new story since June, The Comedy Basement is in no way "done". Is it on hiatus...? Maybe, but I'd prefer to think not.

Why?

Because quite simply, even though no new stories have been posted in 7 months, the "old stories" are still available for those to consume, and even though I don't like to toot my own horn, I think they're pretty great and some are even funnier after you've read them over and over and over again.

I can promise you that The Comedy Basement will return with new stories at some point. When? Only time will tell.

But keep reading and keep coming back to see if we have any new updates!!

Thank you!

Not out of Gas
OK. Here we go, keeping up with my bi-weekly updates. The latest is called Denny the Demon, which is an idea I came up with just a few hours ago.

To be honest with you... I was trying to come up with something new all weekend. I went through just about all my notes and couldn't find anything that worked. For a moment there, I actually thought - could this be it? Am I out of ideas?

But I still have some gas left in the tank.

Remember to vote for your favourite Comedy Basement story on the poll which can be accessed by clicking the link on the main page. DO IT NOW!!!!

See you in 2 weeks.... or maybe even sooner

For the second time this May...
I came up with the idea for The Bloody Chair when I discovered a blood stained chair at my place of employment. It looked like chocolate.

It may have been.

I did not lick it to find out.

Enjoy!


No Reason
Hello!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have no good reason as to why I haven't updated this site in over a month. I also have no good reason as to why I finally decided to update this site... out of nowhere really.

This new story is about Hitler. I think there is a lot of potential humour here, with Hitler and I hope to re-visit this subject at some other point in the future.

But I've always enjoyed the Hitler 'stache. And I have been looking forwrad to writing a story about Hitler and his love affair with his moustache for a long time now. I just always pictured him loving his moustache more than anything else in the world.... which is the real reason for his eventual demise.

Maybe.

I also just wanted to add that I don't think Hitler gets enough credit for having one of the worst hairstyles in history. It's always about the moustache... but the hair is equally if not more atrocious.

I love talking about Hitler though, because he is one of the few people in history who you can say absolutely horrible things about and not have to worry about offending anyone. He's great for comedy!

Juiced Bunny
Hey!

With Easter soon upon us, I decided it is finally time to post the Easter themed story The Fuckin' Easter Bunny.

This story was published in Juice (the University of Winnipeg Creative Writing Journal) last fall.

Enjoy!

Some things are just better than others
Yes hello,

I'll start by being honest: There are times on this site when I post stories just for the sake of posting a story. While I do believe these stories are all good, they are often not what I would deem a 5 star story. They're probably somewhere around 3 stars... still good but nothing to get too excited about.

I do this because I feel that my 7 or 8 fans would rather read a good story than no story at all. I'm not sure that this is the right way to go about things. As a working citizen, I sometimes don't have the time to craft a 5 star story and will end up posting a story that just doesn't meet my standards.

But from this moment on, you will only see 5 star (maybe 4 star) stories on this site. No more 3 star stories. This week I am happy to offer you what I believe is a 5 star story. It's called Toys and it's about a guy who believes his toys are coming alive... something we all dreamed of at one point or another.

Have fun and be safe!

Don't Let This Wicked Moustache Fool You
Yo!!!!!!

Okay, my latest is called The Boyfriend and The Brother and it was a story I wrote a year or two ago while... you guessed it, sitting in a classroom at the University of Winnipeg.

It's a longer one, so bear with me here while you learn a little bit more about this particular Boyfriend and the Brother of his new girlfriend. It's a hoot!!

Keep on rockin'!

The Gold Medal Edition
Hi there,

Well... I actually posted this story a few days ago but have yet to comment on it. So... this is it!!

Meeting My Friend's New Baby was written about a year ago during a lecture in a University classroom. The influence? I don't know. I don't actually know any babies so I can't say that I'm unimpressed by them, but if I did, I imagine that I would have to see them do something spectacular. Looking "cute" just isn't enough for me.

I want to publically announce that I have nothing against babies and I also do not have anything against the parents who show them off like they're one of those bent looking gold medals from the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver (we DID own the podium, btw). To these parents, I say - keep doing strange things with your babies so I can keep writing about it.

Keep on reading and have fun in life!!
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Tony Danza approved since 2009
Epilogue?
Check out the new blog below to find out what's going on with The Comedy Basement.

Also, cast your vote for your favourite story on our poll


Denny the Demon

CARL: You have the tickets?

MARK: Yeah, we just have to wait for Denny to show up.

CARL: Ah man, really? He’s been kind of a stick in the mud ever since he got possessed by that demon.

MARK: Yeah… well, he’s still one of our best friends, so…

CARL: I guess you’re right.

MARK: Hey, here he comes. Remember, just treat him normally.

CARL: I'll do my best.

MARK: Hey Denny.

DENNY: (In a deep, scratchy voice) I have arrived from the depths of hell to deliver you a message from the almighty Lucifer!!

CARL: Hey Denny. How have you been?

DENNY: I am drunk with rage!!! FIERY RAGE!!!! Come with me young minion, for the dark lord is seeking another who is worthy of this cursed gift!!

MARK:
Here’s your ticket.

CARL: It’s for a Jack Johnson concert… you used to really like him.

DENNY: I heed the eternal sound of Satan - Nothing more and nothing less! He is my saviour and I am his bitch!!

CARL: There’s an opening act, too. It’s Ben Harper. Not sure if you know him but… he’s pretty good.

DENNY: I have serviced my evil master for over 10,000 years, helping him punish the sins of human filth. I drank from his flaming black chalice and swallowed his blood!!!

MARK: We should probably get going though.

CARL: Yeah, it actually starts in like 20 minutes.

DENNY: Satan’s blood is my blood.

MARK: Okay… so you guys want to take a cab or should Denny drive us in his car?

DENNY: Drive?!! (Evil laugh) DRIVE?!!!! I am here to amass the retched souls of all of mankind’s most wicked sinners and DRIVE these filthy whores to the merciless bowels of hell where they will be forever castigated for their crimes…. Castigated and raped!!!

CARL: Probably just take a cab.