The Comedy Basement
Denny the Demon
CARL: You have the tickets?
MARK: Yeah, we just have to wait for Denny to show up.
CARL: Ah man, really? He’s been kind of a stick in the mud ever since he got possessed by that demon.
MARK: Yeah… well, he’s still one of our best friends, so…
CARL: I guess you’re right.
MARK: Hey, here he comes. Remember, just treat him normally.
CARL: I'll do my best.
MARK: Hey Denny.
DENNY: (In a scratchy, deep and powerful voice) I have arrived from the depths of hell to deliver you a message from the almighty Lucifer!!
CARL: Hey Denny. How have you been?
DENNY: I am drunk with rage!!! FIERY RAGE!!!! Come with me young minion, for the dark lord is seeking another who is worthy of this cursed gift!!
MARK: Here’s your ticket.
CARL: It’s for a Jack Johnson concert… you used to really like him.
DENNY: I heed the eternal sound of Satan - Nothing more and nothing less! He is my saviour and I am his bitch!!
CARL: There’s an opening act, too. It’s Ben Harper. Not sure if you know him but… he’s pretty good.
DENNY: I have serviced my evil master for over 10,000 years, helping him punish the sins of human filth. I drank from his flaming black chalice and swallowed his blood!!!
MARK: We should probably get going though.
CARL: Yeah, it actually starts in like 20 minutes.
DENNY: Satan’s blood is my blood.
MARK: Okay… so you guys want to take a cab or should Denny drive us in his car?
DENNY: Drive?!! (Evil laugh) DRIVE?!!!! I am here to amass the retched souls of all of mankind’s most wicked sinners and DRIVE these filthy whores to the merciless bowels of hell where they will be forever castigated for their crimes…. Castigated and raped!!!
CARL: Probably just take a cab.
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